You’d think after 23 years we’d have figured out how to do this thing, but nooo-o.

Our intrepid Jenny revue-ers are doing walk-ups today because, apparently, The Jenny Revue passes were all associated solely with my Email address, which meant Arden, Kaitlin, and Ray couldn’t book in advance from their own home computers… and if the booking of tickets falls into my already overflowing hands, we might as well just burn this sucker down right now. I barely know how to walk up and pay cash or a ticket, much less mastermind a reviewer schedule. (I’ve barely got the walking part down.)

But one thing I do know how to do is shoehorn as much copy as possible into these pages (relying on the copy fitting skills of Dave Cramer, of course).

To that end, “Welcome, class, to Jenny-ing 101.” For those who missed our opening single sheet SPECIAL on Wednesday, submitting to the Jenny is easy—we can instruct you (being masochists ourselves).

Just say what you got to say about anything Fringe-y then send it by Email to me at jennyrevue@shaw.ca, or put it on paper and drop it in a Jenny Box, whose locations are noted in the masthead box on our back page.

Then say anything, you want, just do so succinctly.

They say brevity is the soul of wit. (Not that I would know.)

Tell us the name of the show, and, if you can, the name of the group and name of the venue.

Then, say a few words about the show and how it affected you (“laughed my guts out,” “affected me deeply,” “slept well until the gunshots,” whatever). It’s not necessary to give a full recap of the plot, nor list every cast member and character name. Just let folks know enough to help them decide if they might want to see it.

Now I know this will come back to bite me in the ass, so be forewarned, we won’t print the oft-quoted Spinal Tap line “Two words: Shit sandwich!” nor the relatively uninformative “I just loved it,” unless you are such a cultural icon that your myriad followers flock to embrace anything you admire.

And forget ratings. We don’t do stars. We even excise them from the groups’ Shameless Self Promotions (of which there are many here today with more in the can for tomorrow and Monday).

So keep ’em short and, if not sweet, at least cogent.

Be sure to sign your real name (it’s kind of our thang); and, if it’s a paper submission, a contact number in case your syntax or handwriting leaves me saying “huh?” For Email submissions tell us if we have to do anything except hit “reply.”

House bound — Apologies to those I told to look for me on the King’s Head patio. I wasn’t there because my house is demanding my constant presence until such times as a repairman calls. (Cue the porno music).

‘Til I see ya or read ya…

Coral McKendrick